L's First Birthday

Well, before it's a distant memory I wanted to tell you a little bit about L's first birthday party.  We wanted to go out with a bang, as we don't anticipate getting to do a first birthday again.  {Insert mixed emotions here} We especially wanted to share this one with all of our friends who have been a part of our journey with L over the last year.  Our house isn't really ideal for having 50+ people inside it's walls, so we opted for a park party.  I watched the weather like a hawk as soon as it was in the 10 day forecast. That really does as much good as guessing exactly when a baby will be born.  There was a 50 % chance of rain even on the day of the party. Why in the first world of modern technology can they not tell me whether it's going to rain three hours from now?   These situations tempt me to leave behind all eternal perspective.  We had food for almost 60 people and I had a well detailed plan for how I wanted things to be set up at the park pavilion.  See diagram below.

Some people would call this "a little much" but I think this is just reasonable planning when you have a group of people showing up to help you set up with only 30 minutes of total prep time.  Someone validate me here.  I DID NOT want to move it to an indoor location with no playground, no diagram, and round tables for which I had no table covers.  Maybe my desire to make sure parties I host go according to plan is my overcompensation for our wedding that didn't.  Or maybe I'm over thinking it.  Maybe I just turn into a control freak over things like this.  Outside of weather stress I happen to have fun planning parties though.  I don't do it because I think it has to be Pinterest perfect to impress people.  It's just one of my weird creative outlets that I have fun with.  I can make things, check things off a list, and then declare it FINISHED.  That is a rare commodity in my everyday life of laundry, cooking, and cleaning.  The word finished usually just means it's time for me to clean up, wipe a butt, or put something away.  I will admit that four birthdays during the course of a year is a little more work than fun these days.  Jeff would agree...that it's a little more "expensive" than "necessary."  I am also realizing as Micah and Avery get older that fun trumps cute six days a week and twice on Sunday.  So, once you get to birthday number five I will attempt the cake of your choice and we'll do something fun with your friends.  I want them to have fun on their birthday and a banner that takes me three hours to make will not be etched into their favorite memories from childhood.  So instead, we'll go swimming, have Lego building competitions, or play at the park.  I'm actually growing fond of parties that don't require me to clean my house too.  

Back to the current birthday.  We decided to go ahead with the party as planned.  Jeff grilled hotdogs and burgers in the rain and we wrangled plastic table covers onto the tables.  We stapled them, taped them, and weighed them down.  I thought the wind was going to blow eveything up highway 63, including Ella.  But we conquered, we celebrated, the kids played, and we shared it with 56 close friends and family.  It was a good day.  I have the most precious video that I wish I could show you but it's hard to do that since the birthday girl is obviously the star of the show.  Bri did a beautiful job.  If you ever want to watch it I would be happy to share it somehow.  I didn't get a lot of pictures because I forgot to ask my sister to bring her camera.  I felt sick about that when I got home, but we did get a few.  Here they are.

L wasn't feeling great that day so she didn't devour her cupcake like we hoped, but she was a sweet birthday girl.  She handled the craziness and long afternoon like a champ.

I want to wrap up by saying that while this birthday was just as fun as every first birthday we have celebrated with our bio kids, I also felt a simultaneous sadness.  I remember talking to her mama at a court date last summer about us planning this day together and celebrating her victories as we celebrated L's first year of life.  I wanted to help her look into the future with new hope, to see what could be, so maybe she would fight harder for her freedom.  It just didn't happen.  I was the only one who knew about that conversation, but when L's former caseworker hugged me before she left those emotions washed over me.  She has consistently been a listening ear and understands the happy/sad combo of this day.  She cares about her mom as much as I do.  Her love for L's mom encourages me to keep loving her as well, even though our desires for L's future have changed.  Her friendship is such a blessing.

I am thankful for how God has worked over the last year.  It's overwhelming, actually.  I still pinch myself when I think about the fact that we get to be L's family, and have been for a whole year.  Our lives got a bit more complicated on May 17, 2014 while simultaneously getting so much richer.  She is amazing.  Her smile, curiosity, and big hugs have made our home a better place.  We have learned more about grace, prayer, and surrender by her presence in our lives.  We don't know why we have been given this privelege but we sure are thankful for it.  For as long as God gives us the opportunity to have this sweet girl in our family we will cherish it.

So, here's to a year of this sweet girl miraculously entering the world and thriving in it.  God so clearly has his hand on her little life and we cannot wait to see all He will do as she grows.

Happy birthday L.